Personal Relationships Game

How Singles Succeed at the Personal Relationships Game

One thing is certain if you are reading this, you have, at some time in your life, found yourself single, alone and looking for someone to love. When you are part of the Lonely Hearts Club, you hope against all hope that you will finally meet someone who will fit the bill and bring you back to happiness again. So you go on-line and subscribe to a dating site, singles group or register in the personal relationships section of a newspaper or magazine.

You start out eagerly filling in your personal details and writing your 'profile'. It proves much more difficult than you thought it would. How to describe yourself without seeming arrogant, bigheaded, or just brash, is a nightmare exercise. The more modest amongst us struggle to write a paragraph not knowing what to put in and what to leave out, especially if they bring a sensitive, shy or self-conscious nature to the table. Sounding interesting can often turn into a list of dare-devil antics that could drive people away, so what is a person to do? Adding a photograph is fraught with dangers. Which one to choose? Many people are so self-conscious that they just leave them out. Others put up a photo of themselves which represents how they like to think of themselves, only you are left to find out that the photo was taken some twenty years ago when you finally get to meet.

Then there are those who fit the other extreme. Over confident, they sound so wonderful, have achieved so much. Secretly you feel that they just wouldn't want to know you unless you are able to match their characteristics and qualities. And yet, they look so good in their picture, tanned, fit, and wonderful that you long to make contact, and do.

You are not surprised when they don't reply. This just feeds your feelings of low self worth and self-hatred and you give up trying for a while until the reminder that your membership is about to expire draws you back online again.

So how can you shorten the odds and make meeting someone much more rewarding and successful? First of all, you need to build up your confidence by realising just what it is you have to offer someone, and learning how to get that across.

Next, you have to learn some rules about building charisma and developing rapport, so that every time you contact someone, every time you meet you can turn that event into a successful outcome, and your new found friendships into lasting relationships.

For example, when you put up your photo make sure that you are smiling. When you smile you show the most balanced aspect of your facial features and you look warm and friendly, do so with pride. There are many people out there who look far worse than you do and have a lot less to offer. When you write your profile, offer honesty in what you say about yourself and your life. Remember, everyone is looking for love. If people are looking for a trophy they are just not the kind of person who will bring you happiness.

Make a list of things you do well and choose one favourite activity to talk about. Chat to people online as if they are in the same room as you. Relax, play some nice music and think about something good that happened to you recently and your whole writing manner will improve. You will convey something of yourself, of that feeling and that moment to the other and you will seem approachable, someone who would be nice to be with. When you meet, smile. Learn the secrets of building rapport and how to use non-verbal behaviour to the max. If you practice skills in knowing what to say and when to say it, what to do and when to do it, you will have a far greater success at building relationships. Everyone can learn how to choose a mate that is right for them, how to turn a conversation into a friendship and how to turn a friendship into a lasting relationship. All they need to do is know how.